Holy Land Foundation: Terrorist-Supporting Douchebags

Five former officials of the Holy Land Foundation for Relief and Development (HLF) were convicted on all counts of supporting Hamas Monday, the Investigative Project on Terrorism reports.

The original trial had ended in a mistrial last year.

The men, Shukri Abu-Baker, Ghassan Elashi, Mohamed El-Mezain, Mufid Abdulqader and Abdelrahman Odeh, could face up to 20 years in prison for their convictions on conspiracy counts, including conspiring to provide material support to terrorists. The verdicts, read Monday afternoon, ended a two-year saga in what is considered the largest terror financing case since the 9/11 attacks.

The second trial went much more smoothly, after prosecutors streamlined their case.

Prosecutors made a series of significant adjustments, from dropping 29 counts each against defendants Mufid Abdulqader and Abdelrahman Odeh, to adding new witnesses who could put the charity support in context. In addition, jurors in this trial saw three exhibits Israeli military officials seized from the Palestinian Authority which showed the PA also considered HLF to be a Hamas financer and that an HLF-supported charity committee was controlled by Hamas.

The result was a much more streamlined case that followed a logical narrative, said Peter Margulies, a law professor at Roger Williams University in Rhode Island. Seeing the Palestinian Authority reach the same conclusion as the U.S. government had to have helped, he said.

So long, douchebags.

Now They Tell Us: Media Admits to Pro-Obama Bias

During the Presidential campaign, conservatives were complaining long and hard that the mainstream media was explicitly biased towards Obama and against McCain.

After the campaign ended, media analysis outlets reported a media-wide bias for Obama.

And now the media itself is admitting that it was in Obama’s corner the whole time.  Washington Post Ombudsman, Deborah Howell was the first to admit to her paper’s pro-Obama bias in election coverage.

In a second column, she cited examples of this bias.

· The Post put on Page 1 two long stories about “Troopergate” — the allegation that Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin fired her state’s public safety commissioner because he wouldn’t dismiss her ex-brother-in-law from his state trooper’s job. One of the Page 1 stories reported a legislative investigator’s conclusion that Palin had abused her power. When she was cleared by an Alaska Personnel Board report written by a self-described “loyal Democrat” investigator, the story was eight paragraphs long, under a one-column headline on an inside page.

· The Oct. 10 Metro section front featured a story and photo about Rep. Chris Van Hollen (D-Md.) as a “giant-slayer” who had “won plaudits” for his work as head of the House Democrats’ national campaign committee. The story only briefly mentioned his Republican opponent, Steven J. Hudson. A campaign story on both ran inside the paper.

· A Post Magazine spread on Oct. 5 about Michelle Obama, with a cover picture of the Obamas, was timed to the release of a book by Magazine writer Liza Mundy. There was no cover for John and Cindy McCain.

· Robin Givhan‘s Oct. 23 column exploring the disconnect between Palin’s fancy duds and her hockey mom image ran on the Style section front just above an upbeat story about Jill Biden, the wife of Vice President-elect Joseph Biden. Conservatives thought that the placement’s message was “Bad Palin, Good Biden.”

Now Time’s Mark Halperin has chimed in.  At the Politico/USC conference on the 2008 election, he unleashed on the media’s election coverage.

“It’s the most disgusting failure of people in our business since the Iraq war,” Halperin said at a panel of media analysts. “It was extreme bias, extreme pro-Obama coverage.”

Halpering cited two NY Times articles as examples of this slant.

“The example that I use, at the end of the campaign, was the two profiles that The New York Times ran of the potential first ladies,” Halperin said. “The story about Cindy McCain was vicious. It looked for every negative thing they could find about her and it case her in an extraordinarily negative light. It didn’t talk about her work, for instance, as a mother for her children, and they cherry-picked every negative thing that’s ever been written about her.”

The story about Michelle Obama, by contrast, was “like a front-page endorsement of what a great person Michelle Obama is,” according to Halperin.

Of course, why these folks had to wait until after the election to let the public know, Douchebag Report doesn’t know.

‘Mikaeel’ Jackson: Muslim Popstar

No, we’re serious.  According to The Sun, Michael Jackson, weirdo douchebag extraordinaire, has converted to Islam and changed his name to Mikaeel.

MICHAEL JACKSON has become a Muslim — and changed his name to MIKAEEL.

The skint superstar, 50, donned Islamic garb to pledge allegiance to the Koran in a ceremony at a pal’s mansion in Los Angeles, The Sun can reveal.

Jackson was raised a Jehovah’s Witness but was apparently convinced to convert to Islam when the producer Phillip Bubal aka Idris Phillips, and songwriter David Wharnsby aka Dawud Wharnsby Ali who he was working with told him that they thought they had become better people after they converted.

“An Imam was summoned from the mosque and Michael went through the shahada, which is the Muslim declaration of belief.” Mikaeel is the name of one of Allah’s angels.

“Jacko rejected an alternative name, Mustafa — meaning “the chosen one”.

Brit singer Yousef Islam, 60 — who was called Cat Stevens until he famously converted — turned up to help Jacko celebrate.

Is Islam the new Scientology for pop stars?  Good question, but we  here at Douchebag Report have our own theory about what attracted Jacko to the faith.

Father Gives Daughter Stripper Name; Doesn’t Want A Former Porn Star Working At Her School

Fox News ran a story today about how a former porn star, Louisa C. Tuck AKA Crystal Gunns, was working as a school lunch lady and playground monitor at a Vineland, N.J. elementary school and how the community was reacting to the situation.

However, they had another, more tragic story sitting under their noses which they missed.

Fox interviewed Mario Gomez, whose daughter Destiny attends the Vineland elementary school where Tuck works. “It’s not comforting, as a parent of two beautiful girls, I would definitely have a problem with it,” Gomez told Fox reporters.

Let’s take a look at Bacon Magazine’s ‘Top Ten Stripper Names’:

1. Destiny
2. Candy
3. Angel
4. Cherry
5. Raven
6. Anastasia
7. Roxy
8. Houston
9. Porsche
10. Crystal

Mr. Gomez apparently can’t appreciate the irony that he gave his daughter a name which “destines” her to a life of taking her clothes off for money and yet doesn’t want to be around a woman who has moved past that lifestyle.

One has to wonder what kind of douchebag Mario Gomez is going to feel like in twenty years when Destiny is trying to get past the lifestyle he doomed her to.

Watch the Fox Story here:

More Evidence That Cheerleaders Are Whores

Ashley Dupre, age 11.  Cheerleader and future Elliot Spitzer call girl.

Switch Continues Part 2

So it looks like this story is going to become a series because Obama can’t help but do everything he can to reverse every one of his campaign promises.

1. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

Bait:

“We support the repeal of ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ and the implementation of policies to allow qualified men and women to serve openly regardless of sexual orientation.”

Switch:

Not so fast: President-elect Barack Obama will not move for months, and perhaps not until 2010, to ask Congress to end the military’s decades-old ban on open homosexuals in the ranks, two people who have advised the Obama transition team on this issue say.

2. Lobbyists

Bait:

“I’m in this race to tell the lobbyists and the big fat cats that their days of setting the agenda in Washington are over. They have not funded my campaign.  They will not work in my White House.”

Switch:

3.Iraq

Bait:

Immediately upon taking office, Obama will give his Secretary of Defense and military commanders a new mission in Iraq: ending the war. The removal of our troops will be responsible and phased, directed by military commanders on the ground and done in consultation with the Iraqi government. Military experts believe we can safely redeploy combat brigades from Iraq at a pace of 1 to 2 brigades a month that would remove them in 16 months. That would be the summer of 2010 – more than 7 years after the war began.

Switch:

“Obama ran his campaign around the idea the war was not legitimate, but it sends a very different message when you bring in people who supported the war from the beginning,” said Kelly Dougherty, executive director of the 54-chapter Iraq Veterans Against the War.

4. Change

Bait:

change

verb, changed, chang⋅ing, noun

–verb (used with object)

1.to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone: to change one’s name; to change one’s opinion; to change the course of history.

Switch:

The Clinton Administration II

JIM LEHRER: All right, speaking of the new administration, Mark, the word is today, or it’s the — the rumor is today — the word “rumor” is today that Hillary Clinton is going to be asked to be secretary of state by Barack Obama. What do you think of that?

DAVID BROOKS: I actually think that’s a good move. I’d hate to see any single member of the Clinton administration not in the Obama administration. Somebody might feel left out. I think he’s taking the whole group.

• Transition chief John Podesta – Clinton White House Chief of Staff
• White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel – Clinton Administration Assistant to the President for Political Affairs and Senior Advisor to the President for Policy and Strategy
• Secretary of State Hillary Clinton – Clinton Administration Cuckquean
• Chief of Staff of Vice President Ron Klain – Clinton Administration Chief of Staff of Vice President (Seriously?  Obama gave this guy the exact same job?  Seriously?)
• Attorney General Eric Holder – Clinton Administration Deputy Attorney General
• Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner – Clinton Administration Under Secretary of the Treasury for International Affairs

Ashley Grills and Lori Drew: Internet Douchebags

We all know that parents who take an active role in their children’s catty social lives are douchebags of the highest order.  Usually, they’re trying to compensate for the social failures they always were and will be.

If you ever listen to your teenage daughter whining about how much her life sucks and feel an urge to do something about it that doesn’t involve telling her to quite her bitching, just try to make sure you get your whole head in front of the shotgun.

Certifiable Douchebags Lori Drew and Ashley Grills weren’t generous enough to remove themselves from the gene pool, so the rest of us have to face the aftermath of their ultimate in douchebaggery.

The family of Megan Meier, the 13-year-old girl who took her own life after being bullied on MySpace, is demanding justice and jail time for the adult involved in the bullying.

Lori Drew, the Meiers’ 48-year-old neighbor in suburban St. Louis, admitted in a police report that she created a fictitious MySpace account and pretended to be a boy with a romantic interest in Megan. According to the police report, Drew created the profile to find out what Megan was saying online about her teenage daughter.

Megan hanged herself in her closet in October 2006.

Megan Maeir was a troubled girl and Lori Drew and Ashley Grills knew it.

Megan sometimes suffered from low self-esteem and was on medication at the time of her death.

“That is what makes it even more disgusting, that she knew the circumstances around our daughter and still played on it,” said Megan’s father, Ron Meier.

Ashley Grills created the “Josh Evans” Myspace account for her boss, Lori Drew. Drew used the account to start up a “romance” with Megan, then used that account to attack her.

“Megan gets an e-mail, or a message from Josh on her MySpace on Oct. 15, 2006, saying, ‘I don’t know if I want to be friends with you any longer because I hear you’re not nice to your friends,’” Tina Meier said.

The person using Josh’s account was sending cruel messages and Megan called her mother, saying electronic bulletins were being posted about her, saying things like, “Megan Meier is a slut. Megan Meier is fat,” according to The Associated Press.

The cyberexchange devastated Megan, who was unable to understand how and why her friendship had unraveled. The stress and frustration was too much for Megan, who had a history of depression.

Of course, in order to understand what lying douchebags the Drews are, you have to read their public statement from December 2007.

“Contrary to statements reported in various news media around the nation in recent weeks, Lori Drew did not create or direct anyone to create the Josh Evans MySpace account.

“Although she was aware of the account, Lori Drew never sent any messages to Megan or to anyone else using this MySpace account.

“The MySpace account was in place for approximately 29 days. It is undisputed that all messages sent were positive until the last 24 hours.

“Lori Drew was not aware of any mean, nasty or negative comments made by anyone against Megan until after Megan took her own life. In fact, the first negative message was sent by a teenager from another residence, and several other negative comments were made by other teenagers at different locations. The negative comments that were sent by the teenage girl at the Drew’s residence occurred when Lori was not home.

“Lori Drew has been a high-profile target of extreme criticism for things she did not do. This has caused considerable damage to the reputation of the Drew family, both in our community and across the nation.

“The avalanche of criticism forced Lori to discontinue the advertising business she has had in the St. Charles County area for the past nine years. Lori is saddened that businesses that advertised with her company have been harassed in ways that have impacted them both professionally and personally.

Poor Lori.  Do you see how it’s all about her?  A young girl might be dead, but look how Lori’s business is suffering.

Unfortunately, Drew’s denials fell short when Ashley Grills went public.

Jennifer Nicole Anato-Mensah: Douchebag Intern

Jennifer Nicole Anato-Mensah, a 21-year-old University of Minnesota student, was working as an intern at KSTP-TV until they realized that she was an incompetent douchebag. When Danielle Prenevost, an executive producer of KSTP’s newscasts, fired Anato-Mensah, the intern did not react well to this attack to her self-esteem.

The 21-year-old University of Minnesota student is accused of chasing after an executive producer at KSTP-TV, screaming obscenities after she was fired as an intern at Channel 5. She also kicked out and shattered a window in a conference room door in her quest to get at the woman she believed had scorned her, charges say.

“You don’t know where I’m from, I’ll mess you up . . .,” Anato-Mensah told Prenevost.

Prenevost tried to walk away, but Anato-Mensah followed her. A male employee stepped between the two, and Prenevost went into a nearby conference room while the male tried to get Anato-Mensah to calm down and clean out her desk.

But Anato-Mensah ran to the conference room and kicked at the glass door, breaking it. She had to be restrained to keep her from entering the conference room, the complaint said. The cost of repairing the window was $150, the document said.

This just reinforces Douchebag Report’s story yesterday on what little douchebags these Millennials can be.

Douchebag Raps Confession

In September 2006, Rico Wright shot Chad Blue twice, in the buttocks and groin.  At the time, Blue said he didn’t know who shot him.

Then a friend played a CD, “Hitting Licks for a Living”, for Blue on which Wright rapped “Ask Chad Blue, he knows I can shoot”.

So this week, a jury convicted Wright, who is already serving time for a 2007 cocaine-distribution conviction, of two counts of aggravated assault.

Judge Donnie Gillis sentenced Wright to 20 more years in prison and 20 years of probation.

Jarek Molski: Disabled Douchebag

Jarek Molski filed more than 400 suits under the Americans With Disabilities Act and pocketed hundreds of thousands of dollars in settlements before a federal judge banned him from filing any more lawsuits.

In a highly unusual action in 2004, U.S. District Judge Edward Rafeedie, who has since died, branded Molski a “hit-and-run plaintiff,” accusing him of systematic extortion of businesses across California.

Molski, who has used a wheelchair since a motorcycle accident two decades ago, sued restaurants, bowling alleys, wineries and other retail outlets for insufficient handicapped parking, misplaced handrails and other violations of the disabilities act, demanding that business owners be fined $4,000 for every day their facilities failed to meet exacting federal standards.

Molski’s suing days are over, now that the US Supreme Court has refused to review Rafeedie’s order.

Molski isn’t the only douchebag in this story, however.

Molski was traveling abroad and couldn’t be reached for comment, said a secretary at the San Francisco office of his attorney, Thomas E. Frankovich. The Frankovich firm also was accused by Rafeedie of misusing the courts and barred from filing more suits without the judge’s permission.

So we’ve stopped two douchebag leaches. Go America!!!

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